Monday, August 18, 2014

Slouch potato

I jumped in another car the other day to move it, and I almost ended up in the back seat. What-the-heck, I thought. How in the world does anyone drive like this? Then I started to think about it in a larger role. We (not me) have become a world of slouchers.

Think I'm kidding? Look around you the next time you are: 1. shopping in a grocery store; 2. driving down the road; 3. sitting at a gathering with your family and friends, or 4. just walking down the street.

People don't stand up straight any more. They slouch. They're spines are curved from bending over too much. They're chests are sunken because they don't keep their shoulders back and their heads up. It's become more than just poor posture. It's 'the thing'. Slouch and try and look cool. Somehow, I missed the memo that slumping down is cool.

Have you ever seen people sit in chairs they are trying to out to buy? It's pathetic. Men specifically, throw back the seat as far as they can. They need to put their feet up on something. If it's an office chair, they lower it as far as it goes. I've seen guys 6'3 trying to sit looking cool with their knees up their noses. To me, they just look stupid.

It's almost as if guys are in a movie and are trying to scope out the scene. Yeah, I'm cool. Let's pretend we're cops and scan the bar for bad guys. It's definitely a man thing. Of course, I don't think much of that. I say it's time to 'man up' and stand up. And for the women? Do you actually think any of this is cool? Or sly? Or whatever the current word is now?

I say unto you, men of America, it's time to stand up and take back your trousers! Of course, they don't call the them trousers anymore either. I guess I'm just old. Well, at least I stand up straight.

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